I want to be much stronger and not demonstrate any fear
But that would not be me then; but someone else acting here
I can't pretend to be something that I'm not deep down inside
The fact that I'm going back there makes me want to run and hide.
There are some who'll tell me: "no worries, its not like it was before"
But in my memory bank, the reruns playing, hurt me even more
I'm trying to replace these memories each time that they arise
But I can't succeed in doing so before tears have filled my eyes.
They call it post traumatic stress disorder or simply ptsd
Memories become like real actions occurring deep down inside of me
There are ways to fight these flashbacks each time they come back
But denying they simply arent there is like embracing fiction over fact.